To unbury Caesar, not to praise him

Great Caesar’s ghost! French archeologists have discovered a marble bust of the Roman Emperor in Arles. That’s the city Julius Caesar used as a base when battling his rival Pompey to become emperor. Now I’m into history, but these archeologist types really get down and dirty about it. Diving into the mucky Rhône River, they pushed through rusted cars, rot-softened tires and 20 centuries’ worth of silt to drag out a white marble likeness of Caesar. So what did the great Caesar look like? Balding and wrinkled, with a giant Adam’s apple.

Almost from the second the bust surfaced above the polluted Rhône, other archeologists pooh-poohed the idea that it was Caesar. Squabbles broke out. Sounds like a day in the Mooney family, with me and my so-perfect cousin Katie! However, the guys who found the bust pointed out that it resembles the profile of Caesar on ancient Roman coins. In other words, nah-nah-nah-nah-nah. Of course Caesar knew all about squabblers: he was used to dealing with the Roman senate.

Too bad there wasn’t conflict resolution back then. If there had been, on March 15, 44 BC, when Brutus and co. approached the Emperor on the senate steps, they might’ve offered him a Caesar salad – instead of the final course …

A gold mine of resources on Canada's history

There are strange things done in the midnight sun: By the men who moil for gold ...
– Robert Service

Now how could a country with a blood-curdling poem like that written about its history be dull? Enterprising teachers in Chilliwack think Canada is so interesting that it should be celebrated, not just on Canada Day, but year-round. Realizing that students at Greendale Elementary didn't know a whole lot about their country, the teachers founded Club Canada, Eh!, a series of monthly K-12 activities to increase understanding. The activities fit into many areas, especially in Language Arts and Social Studies. Let your schools know about this valuable resource! For more information, contact Greendale Principal Deneen Scott.

Oh, and speaking of moiling (i.e., working hard) for gold, prepare for lots of surprises when Gumboot Books unearths my next mystery, The Gold Miner's Ghost.

Just why Alfred was Great

Before 2009 trickles down and out, let’s hear it for Alfred the Great, whose 1,250th birthday it would be this year. After years of Viking plunder, the Anglo-Saxons finally got a crafty strategist with Alfred – a nice change from his older brother Ethelred, who simply turned and ran when he glimpsed the invaders’ horned helmets glinting in the sun. Ethelred might have reconsidered his cowardice had he known the nickname history would ever after stick him with: Ethelred the Unready.

At first Alfred paid the Vikings blood money to leave his kingdom, Wessex, alone. But then Alfred decided enough was enough. He founded a regular army, as opposed to hailing farmers in whatever field he happened to be near whenever he needed soldiers. He outmanoeuvred the Viking commanders on the battlefield; once he even snuck into an enemy camp in disguise to eavesdrop on their plans. Finally, at the battle of Ethandun in 878, he routed a particularly pesky army of Danes for good. Danish commander (and king), Guthrum, was so repentant, he converted to Christianity. Alfred even accepted Guthrum as his godson! After that, everyone settled down and got along. (Well, until someone named William of Orange came along, but that’s another matter.)

But Alfred wasn’t only great because he stood down the invaders. He was also the first English ruler to establish precepts of law, and encourage people to get an education.

If you look at his statue, he also appears to have been quite a hunk.

Yours respectfully,

Ailie Mooney

The Midnight-Blue Marble's sparkling debut

My first adventure, The Midnight-Blue Marble, got off to a cosy, friendly debut at Once Upon A Huckleberry Bush, the children's bookstore at 4387 Main Street in Vancouver. Melanie read from the blood-splattered beginning of the book -- murder as aperitif, anyone? -- and challenged her audience with a Marble maze, word search and crossword. (My formidable Aunt Colleen gives me cross words all the time, but not the same type.) To receive any of these games, contact Melanie.

The Midnight-Blue Marble is a beautiful, what my snobby cousin Katie would call "elegant," book, published by Gumboot Books, and illustrated by Eleanor Rosenberg. Okay, okay. I'd call it elegant, too.